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  1. I’ve only recently subscribed to you after I saw you on Shane Dawson’s channel 😊 I have BPD and have found your videos so helpful, thank you sooooo much!!! And this video could not come at a better time as my mum has moved back in with me and I haven’t been coping very well. Thank you again ❤️🙈 xxx

  2. My dad always calls me names retarded fat ugly and stupid almost everyday and infront of my son and i hate that and im depressed and cry everyday cause i miss my mom and she passed away so its been very hard on me and idk what to do 🙁

  3. I never met that kind of a therapist… Cabdrivers are way better to talk to than therapists… Therapy can most likely only make you stronger….

  4. I love my mother but she just makes me cry all the time. Sometimes I wish I could just kill my self so that I won’t have to hate my mother. She yells at me almost every single day. I’m always scared to do this stuff said in this video, literally she would just yell at me every single day and when she yells the whole neighborhood can her her. I’ve never seen people yell like that. She is nice to me outside of my house but she would beat me up in the inside at home. I wish I could just move out right now. I was always scared to stand up for my self. I just a fuckin 12 year old. What the fuck am I supposed to do. People would probably think that this a fuckin stupid thing that I probably just don’t get what I want. 1 time I got fuckin 7 cuts on my wrist from getting pissed and sad from my mom and suicidal thoughts. I don’t think that’s trying to get what I want. I like school to avoid my parents. Lemme ask y’all a question. When you where little, you’ve had to had times were you’ve done something bad and your parents are going to notice. Would you be filled with fuckin anxiety that you could barely notice anything around you and barely function. That’s me every time. I have a friend who his mom whoops him and I wad friends with him because f toxic parents

  5. My mum has always been against everything I've been involved with. She doesn't like any of my friends, my hobbies, interests, Music I listen too, my passion for specific things (involved within hobbies and interests), the way I talk, the way I dress, my sense of humour and the fact she chooses not to acknowledge any of my achievements of Simple chores I do. She simply seeks to find the negative out of everything. In terms of chores, the things I have Forgotten to do, things I haven't got too yet and the things I didn't do perfectly. On top of all these she refuses to accept any form of truth. If I told her I did something, she would just say that "You're Lying", even if evidence is apparent

  6. I wanna save my money and get out but my only money now is my allowance and she takes it away. I have no way out for where I live, pls pray for me😞

  7. this was a good vid. thanks. any advice on parents who are toxic with you but great to your kids?  and your kids would not understand staying away?

  8. Since my childhood mom always mock me, insult me and hit me, I'm 30 years old now and she still doing the same to me and my self-esteem is low.
    I'm tired of living with her.

  9. Therapy is so expensive 😭 since iam a student i cant work much and almost all of my money goes to basic stuff like rent and food i dont have 60 dollars a week left for a online hour long therapy session :(.

  10. Hi Kati. I just wanted to say thank you for everything you do. You have helped me so much. So I have a question for you, what should you do if no one believes that your bisexual? Can it really just be a phase? And how long do phases last? Thanks and I hope you have the chance to answer my question. #katiFAQ

  11. That idea of putting a lock on your door is actually a really great idea. I put a lock on my door and now I feel like I have a safe space and I feel like I can actually go to sleep and I don’t feel scared to fall asleep. I blamed it on something stupid in order to get a new doorknob, like the door wouldn’t stay closed (in the context of dogs getting into my room) and said I accidentally picked one with a lock on it when I came home from the store.

    Also, the minimizing time at home thing is a great idea. I did that a ton when I was in college. I pretended I had homework and stayed on campus till the last bus came around at 6pm. I also joined a couple clubs that I had to meet with and lasted longer than 6pm some days.

    I also finally screamed at my mom and told her to stop gaslighting me just because she doesn’t have boundaries with her husband and allows him to gaslight her, she’s not going to do that to me (she was projecting it onto me I feel like) and she hasn’t done it since.

    I also started working on controlling my own emotions with grounding and thought stopping so that my mom couldn’t trigger my OCD (intrusive thoughts), and cause me to have panic attacks.

    Watching this video has really helped me realize the progress I’ve made by watching your videos and seeking therapy like you mentioned. I only had like 1 session with her on better help and it did wonders.

  12. There comes a point when you might realise there's nothing you can do to change them. If you're constantly trying to empathise with them, because you care about them so much, and then you keep getting burned because they revert back to their old ways after a while, you've got cut them loose for the sake of your own sanity. I spent over 30 years trying to change my mum. It always ended up costing me, not her. If you're trapped by having to live with them, you can teach yourself to distance yourself mentally until you have an escape plan ❤️

  13. I don’t agree with leaving you little brothers and sisters alone and leaving ! You don’t run from a situation you DEAL with it ! That’s what I did

  14. Im 17 and my dad is very toxic and abusive and I think I have to run as soon as possible. But it’s hard

  15. Aaah I love your videos Kati but this one makes me feel worse cause all the solutions you gave are so out of reach for me right now

  16. I went to a new therapist. She told me "You're 40 yrs old and just got your GED. You have kids from 3 different father's and your blaming your mother. You needed to stop blaming her when you moved out. This is your your doing." My response was YES! I turned 40. Yes, I decided to go back to school and finish my education and I will continue to do that. I'm enrolled in Community College. I have 4 kids.(One is over 18) I love them dearly. Did I think I was going to be with "him" long term ABSOLUTELY! I tried but I'd rather leave than be cheated on. Do I blame my "Mom" NO. I learned that I choose people like her because I'm trying to repair a relationship thru someone else. I brought that to her attention and she just kept going on. I felt way worse leaving her office. I've never felt so beat down. That was the first and last time I went to her. I couldn't imagine what she says to other people. I opened up to her and I was vulnerable.

  17. Thank you. Ive been gaslighted so many times because noone would believe how crippling my family was to me. How the things theyve done made me numb and made me lose any feelings i had for them. I am aware that therapy is really the next step to get over this and i'm hopeful i can get there next year.

  18. My mom isn't just "hard to deal with" she is really toxic. She has robbed me and made my life hell, got on drugs made me feel unsafe and unloved. She stole my whole childhood. She is my mommy and I love her and I just don't know what to do anymore.

  19. Im a trans male but my parents emotionally abuse me because of it and are very toxic. I cant escape being forced to be a girl. I need to talk to them tonight and I am so scared.

  20. Cant get a therapist, cant save money cuse i dont get any and i cant get a job, bounderys dont work, i dont have any friends apart from ones online, i cant drive, i just cant do anything and ive been dealing with all this stress, hate and sadness for nearly all my life and im 34 but im trated like im 10 and my feelings dont matter… i onlu have two family mimbers that care about me and that i trust but my brother and sister in law can only do so much… im just a wast of life and space…

  21. What if money is simply impossible in a situation

    I grew up in a toxic christian family that feels like money is the greatest evil in the world.

    Thinks they are doing you the greatest favor by taking away every possible contact.

    What then?

    When there is no one at all that will help.

    What then, when the only option is sit and do nothing or leave and starve in the streets.

    No matter how long you stand at the door,

    As long as you can convince yourself you are comfortable you will choose every time sit back down.

  22. My parents were kind of uninvolved. My mom acted like she cared only when she wanted to and would helicopter, but she would also be out all of the time living the club life because she felt she deserved it (for working sooo hard) leaving me to basically raise my little bro. She likes to pretend she's this really good person that she's not. And she refuses to be nothing but ignorant and won't come to terms with things with herself and keeps up this protective "I'm a good person front." What I want from her is for her to admit she isn't perfect and she fucked me up badly and is i the process of fucking my little bro up the same way. And I got out! And I'm super far away so all I can do is be a support system through text, and watch. Anyways, I don't think that she will ever put her ignorance aside. And I get angry all of the time because she coddled me and now I don't know how to do simple things or how to really live because I never got the chance. So, here I am, trying to teach myself these things and trying to tell my mother these things, but she still keeps that ignorance up so I've given up on trying and I'm trying to focus on the parts within myself that this resonates with

  23. How deal with a parent that bipolar dresspion. Alot days she makes me want kill him myself she always says the mean things to me make me feel so little

  24. Is it considered toxic if your parent tends to get drunk and you can tell the difference. I used to think I could get away with stuff just because she was drunk and I knew she didn’t pay attention

  25. Thank you. Im 25 and living on my own now with my boyfriend. We are expecting our first little baby in March. I completely cut ties with my mother and stepfather but Ive been struggling because my older sister thinks Im wrong for doing it. She never lived through the mental abuse my brother and I dealt with because she's 11 years older and was already moved out. My little brother is still at home and calls me everyday crying that he cant handle it anymore. Thank you for saying do what I want with the relationship not anyone else… my boyfriend is 100% on my side with cutting my parents off. I do not want the toxic energy near my baby or him or I.

  26. Someone pls, I'm 18, no degree, no experience, and the jobs that I could get aren't enough to be able to pay a living, are so costly in my country, and if I move on what's next?! I'm really confused and depressed……

  27. I'm dealing with a negative father right now when I tell him to speak positive of me all he says is I can't I can't think positive all because I'm not like my brother and sister who are perfect it breaks my heart 💔

  28. To all those who have a toxic parent, please know it has NOTHING to do with you. Do not listen to them when they blame you for their own failings as a parent.

  29. Since I was a little girl, I always has my parent's pressure to be the perfect child. I suffered bullying at school and couldn't count on them bc they would only listen to themselves, or deffend the bullies. That lead me to having almost no apetite and becoming really skinny. Later on, I made a friend, who made a complete change in my life. But I was young and influenced by my parent's negativity so I became a toxic friend. Last year I got into a fight with her and other friends, and I lost them. For a couple of months I was living in hell. When I was at school I had to sit with a group of girls who weren't really my friends, and watch my REAL friends laugh without me. I looked myself in the mirror and saw a 14 year old that luckily didn't have an eating disorder, but still looked ill. Being at home was also a nightmare, cause my parents would always tell me how much of a failure I was to them, and that when I went to college people would laugh at me for how stupid I was (even when I had one of the highest averages at school). And when I realised all of this, I decided I had to do a massive change in my livestyle. I started going to the gym, to be healthier; I meditated and listened to music for HOURS to escape the world and find the possitive, and also internal peace. I started to speak little to my parents, to avoid useless arguments. And that's how almost a year later I gained 20lbs in muscular mass, started loving myself, spreading love and positive vibes to everyone around me, and got my best friends back. My parents are still shitty but at least now I know its not my fault

  30. I always ignore my mom but when i have to talk with her, when i have no choice, i always end up crying.
    Also, everything she said in the video, i already do it or i cannot do it, so i still don't know what to do…
    Does anybody has other advices please ?

  31. i read things like ignore then, stay away, from them, try and forgive and forget… pretty sure ill only be happy and feel free when i get a phone call that my mom and dad have passed away. this is compassion cause they dont even deserve someone wishing death upon them. 40 years to get to his point. cheers.

  32. I live with my adoptive grandmother currently and she is driving me nuts. She's a widow now, and she was never able to have kids. I live with her because i'm disabled (PKCD) and its like living with a 13 year old kid on every level, except the fact that she is 74 years old. She's VERY youthful for her elderly age, and has always looked 10 years younger than she should at minimum, but after living with her for a few years its apparent that is how she is on the inside too, but in very bad ways. On her best days she is kind and open, and on her worst days she is NOTHING like that person. Cold hearted, stone faced, silent treatment, and the worst part is that she KNOWS she's behaving this way and has no self-control over it. I was raised by TERRIBLY emotionally unstable parents, so her behavior will usually fester and fester during a conversation, until I blow up. I honestly wish terrible things upon her but also depend on her and am so grateful for what she has done for me during this disability. but the distinct behavioral modes she bounces between is so unhealthy for the household. She never does anything to work on or affect her behavioral patterns at all, even if its painful patterns that she clearly can recall, she never can recall the behavior and consequences of siad behavior until AFTER she has repeated it. I think she suffers from something, but she won't do ANYTHING to affect her emotional patterns, including therapy.

  33. I have a Low Self esteem, I've always been concerned about my looks and what other ppl might think…And now my Family is wondering why I don't come outside or interact with them..I told them a million times that I'm not comfortable or no longer interested in being in Society…I Guess I have a Social anxiety being around people ..I just want to stay alone & survive the rest of my Life being unbothered

  34. I am so tired, i want to move out i want my space. I hate it when they judge me because i am doing things my way not the way they want.
    I am not my father I am me, i want to be me, Not like him, he maybe successful in life so what. I am not him i will never be him.
    I want to work and have a life
    I dont want to be a successful businessmen or politician just to surpass him or be like him.
    I just want to be a person that wants to be happy and doing my things my way.

    Thank you atleast you give me a step or guide what i neee to do just to have space.

  35. I have postpartum depression and had temporary postpartum psychosis. My mom told me I was useless and weak for my mental illness. She also said she told my entire family about private videos I sent at age 33 to my now husband that my abusive ex obtained illegally and how filthy I am. She als blames me for my uncles death who was a few years older than me and had substance abuse problems. So she’s out of my life. She wasn’t ever there for me anyway. Never for the birth of my kids, any graduation, we’d go years w/o speaking. So I’m finally at peace. I wish her peace but she’s toxic and abusive. I learned how to be an amazing mom from her being a terrible one. I feel bad that she’s always been so unhappy that she feels the need to constantly destroy my happiness. This comment is my first time speaking up and out about it. I hope those of you living in fear can one day be brave. 💖 you deserve happiness.

  36. It's crazy that the lack of attention/love I got from my parents at a young age suddenly breaks something inside me after 21 years. I now know how bad I was treated and how I never developed a solid self-esteem. Now I have to take the consequences for it.

  37. In order to save my money I need to figure out a way to make it impossible for her to steal my money. Unfortunately she has stolen my hard earned money among other things from me

  38. My mom manipulated me to bully a girl in high school. I made her life miserable, i kind of made everyone hate her. Now, a few years later, i feel so really guilty. I know my sibling is her favourite daughter, and she does so many things that let me understand she hates me- or i disgust her. Toxic to a point that she wants to control my life, manipulate me and everything i do. I can't remember how many times i told my friends that it feels like my life doesn't belong to me. She get me on my fucking nerves, i accumulate way too much anger because of her. For y'all to see, she's that crazy that at my fucking 16 years old, wouldn't let me use tampoms because "they were going to hurt me". I'm bi and she's homophobic, she comments things like : " lesbian sex is disgusting " or makes me feel guilty about my sexuality. She doesn't like anything i do or i want, she didn't even had my back when i had depression. Man, I just want her out of my life, i just can't wait for her to feel extremely sorry for everything she's done to me.

    (Also, i'm asexual because of her… Thanks to a teenage trauma.)

  39. my parents from a young environment shamed me in public to make more friends that i lacked the self confidence and became more introverted and reclused. pretty much i am never good enough. when i graduated and didn't have a job, being at home was near impossible. finally my wife came into my life and showed me how proper parents behave. and she is my beacon of light that has allowed me to stand up to my parents.

  40. Have watched this a billion times and I will keep doing so to remind myself it's not ME, but THEM who have the problem

  41. wow this video took me back to my teens and early 20s. I did just as you suggested, so grateful I took control of my happiness. I do look back and wish I had taken my brother and sister with me when I moved out at 22. Unfortunately, my parents toxicity was taking a toll on our sibling connection, luckily we held on tight to each other and now in our 30s we are very close and try our best to keep our toxic parents at arms length. So sad but it's the only way we can maintain balance in our lives.

  42. hey Kati, your videos are really helpful. Right now I'm struggling with my relationship with my mom. She has cast such a long shadow on my life that I recently found I was a hopeless codependent and currently trying to come out of it. But more recently, she has become even a greater problem to me because we live together and she keeps yelling at my child. No matter how much I intervene or no matter how much I teach my kid to handle her, it's no use. I'm really concerned. My mom's a good person and I don't have any grudge against her but I can't silently watch her mistreat my child. I've been planning for some time about living separately from my family but since I'm a single mother I'll have to lean on them for this or that anyway. So I can't completely avoid them. How can I protect my child in such situation , I need to understand and know. I'm really worried.

  43. my parents gave me anxitey and depression. 🙁 this video i can relate too sadly its my reality. they always ask have you found a job and i would say no, maybe. 🙁

  44. I'm almost 23 years old, and still living with my father, who is very emotionally abusive. I have been dying to move out for years now.

  45. Love your channel, especially when I can validate my experiences and what I did to survive them. I did stay away (library, friends, cafe) and had the lock on my door etc. I'm a survivor of a toxic parent .

  46. So me and my mom went to a therapist that has a emotional support dog for clients that feel calmer talking about things while petting the dog, and I kid you not, we had this woman petting her own dog during the session. Lol

  47. I can’t take another day with her belive me this is over 30 years of trying. She’s driven ever family member away and the few very young ones are caught up because of her money! I don’t want this anymore . We all gonna leave the money and stuff right her on earth and we’ll be gone. Question is do you wanna live your life in peace or with the misery of a vicious human because they have wealth . I don’t want to go there . I don’t want to see her or hear her . A phone call once every two months will do me. I’m dying inside. Everyone else walked away and has nothing to do. I want the power and strength NEVER!! To be in the pits of that . Evil cold narsasistic behaviour . Again it’s awful . She never sees her wrong she shouts and speaks over you she cry’s to block you from speaking. She says hello and smiles on day and the next it’s demons to the ready.our of no were for nothing. God this is truly making and has made me ill. F..k what you got . I want my peace of mind. Sad your own siblings and children don’t want you . Enough

  48. As soon as i'm able to live independently, i'm just breaking away from my parents so i got nothing to worry about :/ its been happening for more than 10 years now btw this is probably why people are silent in public or thats why i am 😐

  49. i’m 13 and all my mom does is yell , every day it’s something new , my dad and her are divorced and i can’t see him all the time my moms always calling me names , hitting me and i can’t talk to her about anything i don’t know what to do anymore . she won’t let me go to “therapy “ because she thinks i’m crazy but she’s the one who’s crazy

  50. My mother has always been abuse. She manipulated everyone surrounding to make me look bad. Has always look bad on everything I do “my fault”. She changes her mind all the time. I’m an adult now is the same thing over and over again. Never had support. Her solution is me having therapists, working, putting me down. No boundaries. Is awful!
    Homophobic for almost 21 years

  51. It’s comforting to see how many others struggle with this. I can be hard going throughout the day seeing how many have great relationships with their parents and think you are the ONLY one who just doesn’t.

  52. im in a situation where i am being emotionally abused… my dad and step mom can be nice but most of the time i get told '' it was a mistake bringing you here " or " all you do is cause problems" " im so tired of you" or you shouldnt live with me, you are causing too much drama" an things like that… it hurts … they say im dissapointing and it really hurts … im so tired of it.i am only 14 almost 15 but once i am 16 or 17 i wanna live alone , that way i get way from all the problems i cause to them an i can have my own freedom, talk to whoever i want, be with whoever i want .. and the thing is … i have a choice to live with my real mom if i wanted to… but the problem with that is two things… i have had issues with my mom in he past too, and my big sister and i have also had issues in the past. ive had so many problems with my sister, dad and mom that police and cps had to once get invloved. and also dont wanna leave the school i am in right now i dont wanna loose all the friends i have made that has helped me through so much… or have to do long distance relationship… my boyfriend is the only one that i trust right now and he make me feel safe when i m around him… i wanna live with my friends and their parents… it probably better for me .. i know it wont feel the same and itll be different but at least i wont have to deal with yelling and mean parents and … someone please hep me … i need advice

  53. I wish someone would rolemodel or showcase a healthy,uplifting relationship (by acting it in a scene of example),
    to give people how have been raised poorly & dont know better about the potential of relationships, a realistic feedback, so they can identify when maybe a subtle manipulation or poor behavior in general is happening to them.

    Because I just know in my case, I am 27, i didnt even realize what is poor behavior & affecting my self-esteem, because it was all i ever learned & knew as a single child, with 2 really traumatised/toxic parents. So i stayed under their toxic fingers, not even knowing about breaking out & standing up for myself, which than let me with a pessimistic/frustrated outlook on other relationships that would bei healthy, recovering & uplifting for me. I wouldnt even trust going to seek a therapist. So I isolated myself & got stuck in that situation of low self-esteem.
    I believe there are more cases of this & it would help the ones only dare themselves to seek help & escape from their parents reality via the web/videos.

    I think this would be a great "closing the gap" step for people to seek therapy, as youre theoretical videos already are. But if its practical by example it would be less abstract & giving more very needed inside for the ones who suffer greatly from not daring & knowing better.

    Thanks for reading the whole comment. 😉

  54. When it comes to my mom, there is no middle point. Best just to cut contact which I did last summer. She contacted me again this spring on FB and I blocked her. She's always managed to manipulate me into taking up contact again but not this time. When she realised she couldn't do that anymore, she took away her last name, which originates from my grandfather who was my biggest idol as a child (only she and I had that last name in our family since both my grandfather and grandmother passed away a long time ago). I think she was extremely jealous of how close I was to my grandfather. She always talks bad about anyone I have/had a special relation to. Even though my grandfather passed away when I was 12 (I'm 37 now), I still cry when I think about him. He did everything for me and I know I would not be alive today if I hadn't had him in my life. He was my only security so when he passed I was and still feel lost. He was like a parent to me, my only parent.

  55. I hate my parents coz they tell u what to do what to wear if they made a decision they not ask my permission they just booked me a ticket to go with them I hate them so much and they treat me like a kids.i cannot do anything there house there rules it’s very hard if u leave with ur parents they control u in everything sick of them.i think ur gonna be free if u have ur own family thats the time they will stop controlling u in to ur life.

  56. My dad is unbearably toxic. He's been through so much in his life and has trouble trusting ANYONE, this includes family members on both sides, my siblings and I, even my mom. I understand that he's had it hard, but I don't think we deserve being talked down to and treated so rudely. He doesn't even like my mom going outside with me and my sisters on trips, because he thinks she'll see other men. We're not respected. I've confronted him before, but he gets defensive and turns it into a "you hate who I am" lecture.And ALL my family members see it and how it effects us. They tell us to leave him, but THAT'S not my choice. I know he cares and loves us, he just doesn't show it like others do.

  57. Thank you for that video. I was looking for a long time for some advices. I am 38 and my father destroyed my childhood, everything I've achieved in life so far I did on my own. The bad thing is, that I also got many bad attributes of his toxic character, something that my partners through all this years in my life didn't like and I can completely understand that. This is one of the reasons I am alone, and to be honest I don't want to put my partner through the same things my mother had to go through…

  58. It makes me so upset that parents can bring a child into this world and cause so much havoc In the developmental process of the child and cause so much trauma for them and then when the child grows up and is depressed and hating life and hating their parents that the parent then goes and tells their own child to get help In a condescending way. They do nothing to help their child get help, they are not emotionally there for them but they tell their child to get help whenever that child who is now an adult brings up past trUma and can now confront them. It’s a slap in the face. It’s like me going and damaging someone’s home, and then tell them I have no responsibility for ruining their space and now they have to spent time effort and money and go through more pain trying to pick up the pieces they never broke themselves.

  59. Also saving money is easier said than done when you’re a student and owe thousands of dollars and make 200$ a week and have bills and a dog and a car to pay for. I wish I could leave but this is the best option for me while I’m in school and have a dog who is my absolute world. People have told me get rid of my dog when my dog is my absolute world. She is my therapy. She is my safe space and people act like dogs have no emotional Impact on people when a dog can change a persons life.

  60. 🤔🤗 ENGLISH IS NOT MY NATIVE LANGUAGE SO EXCUSES ME everyone who is reading this let me tell you this you are not alone there are so many people in earth been there(me too) i have a narcissistic insecured and toxic mom the only solution to this problem is improve yourself and your life and please don't tell yourself that you love them so you can't move forward in your life actually if he or she is not in your life you had a really better life trust me you are not mentally ill like your parents get knowledge from youtube improve yourself exercise daily be financially independent from your shitty parents and move forward from your abusive parents youtube channels like EVAN CARMICALE ATHLEAN X ALPHA M. TONY ROBBINS AND VALUETEINMENT are best and last but not the least believe in yourself you deserve a better life and you can do this all the best! TAKE ACTION NOW🤔😇💪

  61. My parents are best when i listen them, but when i don't they GET VICTIM MODE! I'm too stressed everyday that it has started to effect on my sleeping quality as well.

  62. This is great and all but my dad won't listen to me and doesn't let me do what I want if I try to do anything I am told off and called ungrateful. other people who know about his horribleness don't want to do anything as my dad acts much better in front of them and lies about me saying I am useless and stupid my dad is very stubborn and my mum defends him. I want to move out but I am 13 and still have 5 years of this torture I am constantly told I am useful, I will never get anywhere and that I can't do anything right, my peers look up to me as I get amazing grades and am nice to them but I have never told anything to them about my parents as I am too scared, they act nice in front of others but are hell when no one is around.

  63. My dad is emotionally and verbally abusive, and every time I hear or look at him I want to cry. When I grow up, he wants 60 percent of my future paycheck, and wants me to call him every day of my life.

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